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RATING: PG

FEEDBACK: Usually a good thing.

NOTE: This round robin fic was spawned last evening due to the fact that our real-time on-line Buffy role playing game was cancelled due to real life happenings. Great literature it ain't, but we had fun doing it.

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*****

It was homecoming. One of Cordy's favorite times of the year. Especially since she just knew that she would be named Homecoming Queen. Although she was dating Xander Harris, she was confident enough that she would have the votes. SO confident in fact that it called for a trip to the mall. A new dress was in order. She decided to bring Xander along in hopes of forcing him into buying a new suit that looked like he hadn't picked it off the rack! So with thoughts of a Homecoming victory in her head, Cordy jumped into her BMW and sped off to pick up Xander.

So Cordy dragged a reluctant Xander off to the mall. "But I don't NEED a new suit! What's wrong with the one I have?" Xander asked. "Well, first of all, the jacket is pale blue, secondly, the pants are plaid. We are NOT going to the dance with you looking like that!"

"Yeah, well..." Xander began. "What if they theme Homecoming for the 70s?" Cordy merely glared at him and swung her car into a smaller-than-average spot at the mall. It was definitely crowded for a Saturday, but in the burgh like Sunnydale, where else is there to be?

Cordy swung her door open, dinging the Dodge Dart next to her w/o a care in the world while Xander tried to squeeze out carefully next to the VR6 Golf on his side. "Cor? he asked. Just how am I to pay for a new suit? I'm in highschool!!"

"Don't worry about the money. I have daddy's platinum card. He won't even notice the charges with all I have to buy today." Xander groaned. He decided that he would rather spend the day with Giles cross referencing. This "little" shopping trip was gonna earn him some serious closet time.

Before they entered the mall, Cordy clued him in her mall strategy. "First we have to go to Sax for the dress. That should take about 2 hours. Then another 40 to 45 minutes in the shoe department."

Xander groaned again as Cordy described her plan in detail, taking up Xander's entire day. But being the faithful boyfriend, into the fray he went. Besides, he didn't have to pay for anything, so it couldn't be too bad.

After Cordy had been looking at dresses for about 45 minutes, Xander found himself staring at the watch section of the store as the seconds of his life ticked by as Cordy tried on dress after dress. As Xander tuned out Cordy's frivolous debate on dress, he started humming "Girl from Ipanema" as it was broadcasted over the store PA system.

"Xander? What do you think of this one? Xander? Xanderrr!"

"Hmm hmm hm hm, the girl from ipanema goes walking....huh? Oh! oh, yeah yeah it's fine Cor...really, ah He started looking closer at the dress. "Cor?"

"What? Does it make me look fat?! What?!"

"Is there a storage closet nearby?"

Cordy gave Xander a glare that would have frozen the Colorado Hot Springs. "Xander.this is important. I have to look my best. And all you can think about is finding a closet and making out?" Xander swallowed hard. "Um uh" He decided in this case that honesty might actually get him out of the doghouse. "You look really hot in that dress. And well.just call me hormone boy OK?"

Cordy gave him another dubious look. Before she could say anything, Xander backed up a few feet wondering if maybe he was pushing his luck. Cordy took another look at herself in the mirror before turning back to Xander.

"Cordy, trust me, you look really great!" Cordy turned and smiled at Xander. "Really?" Than she whispered in his ear, "Lemme pay for this, than we'll go find that closet."

Cordy kept the dress on, paying for it with her daddy's credit card. The two left the store and found a little hall that looked like it might lead to a broom closet or something, away from the crowds of the mall.

Cordy led Xander down the little hall like the boyfriend he was. She quickly found a door marked Nine West Storage....:"Nine West makes nice shoes if'n ya didn't know. "Quick, in here," she said and dragged him inside.

Xander and Cordy proceeded to engage in quite the long and drawn out "make out" session. Well, to be honest to you the reader, there was a bit of groping included and....Well, I'll be even more honest....Bill and Monica would be embarrassed by what these kids did! However, on the plus side, Cordy found a pair of pumps in her size that she took as a lovely parting gift.

Cordy took a look at her watch. The were two hours behind schedule!!!! But what a "two hours" it was! "Now back to business Xander. "Come on. We need to go to the Men's Department Neimens."

After they entered the men's department, a tallish gentleman with a balding head and mustache walked up to them and asked if he could be of assistance. "My boyfriend needs a suit to go with this dress that won't make him look like a loser." The man nodded and called for a sales assistant. "Mr. Humphries, are you free?"

"I'm freeeeee!!!" Xander marveled as the most awkward gentleman virtually pranced over to where he and Cordy stood.

"And what can I get for the gentleman?"

Xander was ready to quip something nasty back, but Cordy promptly stamped his foot and interrupted. "We need to find him something to match this dress, it's for homecoming and trust me I don't plan on losing. Anyway we need to fix him up with something that won't let him look like the loser he pretty much is."

"Well," Mr Humphries said doing that little crossed-arm thing he did when he was contemplating, "I think something in a tan double breasted suit would fit him perfectly!"

A look of concern washed over Cordelia's face. "This won't be off-the-rack will it?" Mr. Humphries patted her on the arm. "Don't worry dearie, we'll fix him up all pretty for you." Now a look of concern washed over Xander's face.

Mr. Humphries took hold of Xander's arm and lead him behind a partition to take his measurements. Cordelia waited patiently. A few moments later she heard Xander cry out. Being Sunnnydale, she grabbed a stake out of her purse and darted behind the partition.

Cordy swung around the partition, stake in hand, in time to see Mr Humphries rolling up his measuring tape and Xander with still a very startled look on his face. "Thirty two inch inseam, just as I guess," he said and walked past Cordy muttering a quiet "lucky girl" as he passed.

Cordy looked blankly as he passed and then, putting her stake away, turned back to Xander. "Well, that had to be an experience," and snickered. It was Xander's turn to glare. "You better stay near the dressing rooms at this rate." he said and walked back out into the department.

As Xander brushed past her, she thought she heard Xander mutter something like "related to Larry", but she was too busy staring at the woman with purple hair over at the Ladies Counter to take any real notice.

Cordy chatted a few moments with Mr. Humphries to make sure the suit would be ready in time for the dance. Once she was satisfied it would be, she grabbed Xander and headed on to the next store.

Xander looked on in horror as he saw their next destination. It was No-man's Territory. As he struggled against her grip, Xander resigned himself to his fate. He was being dragged into a Clare's Accessory store!

Xander bravely endured the attack of the accessories that Cordy threw at him. From lapel pins to cuff links, from a gaggle of earrings to necklaces of every length, they must have spent a good two hours here as well. Before long, Xander stomach possessed him and he turned into Cro-Xander, dragging his woman off to the food court for dinner.

Xander feasted on an upsized value meal from McDonalds while Cordy simply picked on a salad. "You did good today Xander." "Well it really wasn't all that bad." Xander replied as he remembered their time in the shoe closet. "I might even consider doing it again," he stated thinking it might again gain him some closet time.

"Don't worry Xander. There will be plenty of other chances?" Xander tried to mask his horror. "Wha...what do you mean *other* chances?"

"Let's see. After homecoming, there's the Fall Fling, the Christmas Dance, the Spring Fling, the....."

Again Xander groaned and resigned himself to his fate. Besides as long as there were closets at the mall, he'd let Cordelia drag him shopping.

~End~